Wind the Mummy Up

Raise your hand if you, like me, will remember the words to the ubiquitous “Wind the Bobbin Up” until the day you die?  Recently I took the Feral Children to the library (I know, I know, big mistake – I only went because FC#1’s new teacher “suggested” that the children visit the library during the holidays,and it would be nice to look like a good parent at the start of the year at least) – and we just so happened to be there when Rhyme Time was on.

Rhyme Time, in case you don’t have children, is basically a group for parents and their babies where you all sit round in a circle and sing mind-numbingly shit nursery rhymes and other ridiculous songs, and bounce the babies around a bit.  I can’t believe anyone actually enjoys it – my babies certainly never did.  So I have no idea why all the songs (ALLLLL the songs) are so ingrained in my brain.

So anyway, we ended up joining in with a bit of this Rhyme Time session the other day, and by jove they sang Wind the Bobbin Up.  Of course they did!  And I dutifully sang and did the actions and my children wandered off and I was left there by myself (which is what always used to happen, once they could crawl away from me, the feckin’ deserters).

Wind the Bobbin Up has been the bane of my parenting life – why are we even still singing about bloody bobbins in this day and age?!  So I decided to re-write it and make it a little more relevant to me and my family.


Wind Your Mummy Up

(to the tune of that bloody awful song “Wind the Bobbin Up”

Wind your mummy up,

Wind your mummy up,

Whinge, moan, push push push.

Wind her up again,

Wind her up again,

Fight, groan, push push push.

Make her hit the ceiling,

Make her hit the floor –

Want to throw you out the window,

Want to walk right out the door.

Make her take deep breaths and count to three,

You’ve done your job, she’s on her knees!

What do you reckon?  My version is way better, right?

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