Nose-picking Shepherds and Bum-scratching Kings

Last week it was FC#1’s school nativity.  I like my son’s school for many reasons, but I particularly like the fact that they do a proper old-fashioned nativity.  None of this weird “holiday lobster/zebra/hamster” shit.  I am not remotely religious (far from it), but at this time of year you just can’t beat a good old sing-song at the local church and having a discrete weep at the overwhelming cuteness of little kids dressed as shepherds and angels.

As well as finding a little tear or two in my eye, I inevitably piss myself laughing at the hilarity that is little kids on stage.  This year we had a panicked Mary who lost her cape halfway through a song, and didn’t know quite what to do, so bobbed up and down undecided as to whether or not to pick it up.  We also had a tripping Wise Man (not on drugs – he tripped over.  Although that really would have been hilarious).  There was an X-Factor wannabe singing angel who put more enthusiasm into her singing than the rest of the kids put together, a wayward halo and a shepherd who practically hurled his lamb at Jesus.  There were at least two nose-pickers and a scattering of bum-scratchers.  And of course, loads of waving and “hi Mum!”.  It was gorgeous.


My son, naturally, was not Joseph, or the Star of Bethlehem.  Nor was he the Angel Gabriel – he’s nowhere near angelic enough for that.  But he made a very fine “villager”, did a great job of saying “His ears are too long” (don’t ask), and despite not knowing all the words to all of the songs, my little star smiled a beaming smile all the way through.  And that, my friends, is all the Christmas magic I need.


(I’m allowed an Alpha Mummy moment once in a while, aren’t I?!)


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  • Jo Sandelson 09/12/2016 at 3:27 pm

    You’re allowed SEVERAL Alpha Mummy moments and so is your smiley Alpha villager xxJo

  • Fran Back With a Bump 13/12/2016 at 7:33 am

    Think yourself lucky they got a nativity. We ha christmas around europe. A 20 minute extravaganza. Thanks for hosting #chucklemums you’ve been awesome xx

  • Alison (MadHouseMum) 13/12/2016 at 11:25 am

    Well done Alpha mummy and her villager! You can’t beat tradition. School nativity’s are pure comedy. By senior school it gets very serious with choirs in churches – enjoy the humour while you can 🙂 Alison x #Chucklemums

  • Turning Up In Devon 13/12/2016 at 11:53 am

    There’s nowt so magical as a school Nativity! Our whole school did one this year – a bit trickier finding an innkeepers costume for a 9 year old!
    Can’t beat an alpha moment! #chucklemums

  • Rhyming with Wine 13/12/2016 at 1:12 pm

    Aw Alpha Angel move over! There’s a new Alpha in town! We will be starting the joy of nativities next year. We shall begin practicing our nose picking and bum scratching shortly. 😉 Thanks for hosting the #chucklemums finale – I’ll be sorry to see your linky go! x

  • Mother Undercover 13/12/2016 at 6:35 pm

    Brilliant. I can’t wait for my turn to go to nativity plays. My nephew was the star last week. So cute! #chucklemums

  • Nursery Whines 13/12/2016 at 7:05 pm

    Mary sounds hilarious. I love the one really theatrical kid whose jazz hands always stand out. We had a hilarious one at our Carol concert last week. Farewell to #chucklemums. I salute you.

  • Karen TwoTinyHands 13/12/2016 at 7:39 pm

    Awww well that is cute! Yes everyone is allowed that alpha mummy moment!! #chucklemums

  • Mouse, Moo and Me Too 13/12/2016 at 8:24 pm

    Aaaaaah 🙂 Er, what’s the protocol on the street now vis a vis a mince pie and shot of sherry? We’ve got ours on Thursday which isn’t even a pre-school day, meaning I need to dress her myself and get her to the venue rather than leaving the staff to do it. I feel a bit conned from the outset tbh. #chucklemums

  • and another ten things 13/12/2016 at 9:06 pm

    It’s my daughter’s first nursery carol concert tomorrow – I can’t wait, it’s going to be cuteness overload. I fully expect to cry. #chucklemums

  • Michelle 13/12/2016 at 10:52 pm

    Aww my Miss J had her nativity the other day and was a towns person. We couldn’t see her as we were right at the back, but she loved it. You can’t beat a traditional nativity #chucklemums

  • Squirmy Popple 14/12/2016 at 12:29 pm

    There’s nothing cuter than kids performing – I’m not religious either, but I can’t wait to see the Popple up on stage doing the whole nativity thing when she’s older. #chucklemums

  • Single Mum Speaks 18/12/2016 at 9:44 am

    Aww! Piglet had his first nativity at nursery the other day. I was at work so couldn’t go, but my mum sent me pictures. He was just sat there looking baffled in a reindeer costume. So adorable! #chucklemums


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