COFFEE! Screams Beta Mummy. Coffee NOW!

I love a good coffee shop, me.  Whenever I get some child-free time, I inevitably scurry off to my favourite independent cafe, where I can have a lovely hot cuppa and eat a nice piece of homemade cake in peace.  I have spent many a happy hour doodling and writing in a coffee shop, fueled by caffeine and cake.
It’s not quite so much fun when the kids are involved, I’ll be honest.  They take after their mum and are quite keen on cake themselves, so if I want to avoid sharing my own, I have to buy them a bit each.  And some sort of drink, which will get spilled, of course (but that’s fine, because turns out they didn’t like it anyway).  Costs a bloody fortune.  The cake they insisted on having usually ends up being not the one that they actually wanted (DUH mummy, how could you not know?) so they eat mine instead.  I eat the one that they have had a bite out of, played with, put their horrible sticky fingers all over, and mashed up a bit.If I’m lucky they might do a bit of colouring, or play quietly on my phone (*BAD MOTHER ALERT*) so I can read the paper, have a snooze, or simply enjoy a vaguely hot caffeine infusion.  At times like this I feel like I am truly winning at parenthood.  It rarely lasts long – before I know it, one of the Feral Children announces to the whole shop that he needs a poo, whilst the other one is eating crumbs from the floor beneath someone else’s table.

If you’re really lucky, like me, your local coffee shop will have fantastic staff that love kids (this rules out most of the high street coffee chains that I’ve ever visited), and will happily entertain them for a while, without even charging extra!  No wonder it’s my happy place.

Alpha Mummy having coffee (decaff) with her little angels, whilst Beta Mummy is receiving an intravenous coffee as the feral children run riot.



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