Tag Archives : alpha mummy

Alpha Mummy having coffee (decaff) with her little angels, whilst Beta Mummy is receiving an intravenous coffee as the feral children run riot.

COFFEE! Screams Beta Mummy. Coffee NOW!


I love a good coffee shop, me.  Whenever I get some child-free time, I inevitably scurry off to my favourite independent cafe, where I can have a lovely hot cuppa and eat a nice piece of homemade cake in peace.  I have spent many a happy hour doodling and writing in a coffee shop, fueled by caffeine and cake.

Halloween Pumpkin Lanterns…Alpha Mummy & Beta Mummy Style.


Halloween isn’t my favourite installation on the calendar, to be honest.  This is partly because it falls during Autumn, which I make no secret of disliking.  It’s just after the clocks go back, which means I’m full of despair at the short days and the feeling that spring will never arrive and that we are doomed to darkness for ever and ever and ever…. 

Family movie day with Alpha Mummy & Beta Mummy


A movie day with the family is such a nice idea, isn’t it?  When it’s blowing a hooley outside, and lashing with rain, sometimes it is really lovely to say “F*ck it, let’s stay in our pyjamas all day and watch films and eat popcorn and cuddle up together on the sofa”.

Beta Mummy praying for the end of this rainy day, the house is wrecked!

Rainy Day Survival with Beta Mummy and Alpha Mummy


“There’s no such thing as bad weather”, Alpha Mummies declare, “only bad preparation!”

I beg to differ.  When I wake up to another rainy day and the sound of the wind rattling my bedroom window, my heart sinks.  My Feral Children do not cope well with being penned up indoors.  But some days, it’s unavoidable.

Recycling Crap with Alpha Mummy & Beta Mummy


Turns out this week (25th September – 1st October 2017) is Recycle Week! Which is handy as recycling happens to be the subject of my latest doodlings. Now I’m hoping that some of you can identify with me on this, because whilst I am a good little recycler, I can’t help but feel a little…Beta when I’m putting the recycling bin out.

Beta Mummy attempts a very unrelaxing bath with the feral children

Bath Time with Alpha Mummy & Beta Mummy


Bath time in my house has never been part of our daily routine.  Being in the bath has never seemed to relax my kids – quite the opposite in fact – so it never made sense to do the whole dinner-bath-bed thing.  Also my kids are massive soap-dodgers, and I have zero energy left to argue by the end of the day.  Unfortunately it turns out that boys really start to stink as they get older…so every so often I have to dunk them, kicking and screaming, into the tub.

Grow Your Own Veg with Beta Mummy


Grow your own! They said. It’ll encourage your kids to eat vegetables! They said. Well I grew my own – or at least attempted to – but did it bollocks make my fussy Feral Child #1 eat his veg.