A Beta Attempt at Work-Life Balance


I was contacted recently by a lovely reader, asking if Beta Mummy had any advice for attaining a good work-life balance. (ha ha ha I know, I know).  It seemed like a good time to publish these doodles I did a while back , of Beta Mummy and Alpha Mummy at work.

Even Alpha Mummies struggle…


I have created a whole world of doodles laughing about the fact that I (er…I mean Beta Mummy…not based on reality at all…ahem) can’t really cope with my kids, that my life has been turned entirely on its head by family life, and that basically I am one big mess.  I write and doodle to make people laugh – and people do!  They identify with me, they laugh at (with?!) me – and let’s face it, a huge proportion of the issues that affect parents every day are funny.  Or at least have a funny side, even if it’s several days/weeks/months/years later that you manage to find it!

But what about when life is not fun?  What about when you look around you, and everyone else seems to be coping with the ups and downs of the everyday, but you find yourself feeling alone and struggling to manage?

Big School…But He’s So Small!


FC#1 started school today.

 

I may be a Beta Mummy, but I’m not a heartless bitch.  Even though I complain about my children all the time, and even though I spend most of my time with them wishing that they’d go to bed already so that I can get on with the serious business of wine-drinking, I do actually love them – honest!

 

On paper, today isn’t a big deal.  I work pretty much full time, so both of the Ferals have been in one form of child care or another since they were a year old.  FC#1 going to school means spending only marginally less time with him than I’m used to.  He was at the school’s nursery all of last year, so he knows the setting, he’s familiar with the uniform, he knows the staff and many of the other kids – he was excited and raring to go.

 

But it is a big deal.

#Chucklemums Public Service Announcement


I bet you came here expecting the #Chucklemums linky… Well I’m very sorry, but we’ve taken the week off to re-brand and re-centre ourselves, or something, and we will be back with you next week. Please don’t cry! While you’re here, why not check out last week’s winners? Twice Microwaved Tea is getting ready to become a Bake Off pro…

Like An Urchin in School Uniform


My original Feral Child, FC#1, has his first day at school next week.  Determined not to start his/our first ever school year term as a totally incompetent, useless, disorganised Beta Mummy, I have taken steps to shuffle at least a little way along the Alpha/Beta Mummy Spectrum.

  1. I bought myself a new diary, and wrote the term dates in it (you’re impressed, right?)
  2. I sorted out the massive bag of hand-me-down school uniform I was given (ok, an actual Alpha Mummy would buy new).
  3. I named all the uniform!  (I know, I know – I needed a sit down and a glass of wine, too, to recover from the shock).

A Trip to the Park with Alpha Mummy & Beta Mummy


It has been pretty good weather this summer, so we’ve been making the most of it and spending lots of time outside.  As I’ve said before, this is not because I am an Alpha-parent – far from it.  It simply means less time for my feral children to trash the house.  Our trips out have included plenty of visits to the beach, and approximately 47 trips to the park…

School Shoe Shopping with Alpha Mummy & Beta Mummy


In just a few short weeks, my oldest son (FC#1) starts school.  This marks the start of many new and exciting events, and many stressful and arduous, too.  The worst thing is that this September to September merry-go-round ain’t gonna stop now until, god, around 2031.  “Back to School” this year, for us, is simply “To School”.  For the first time, I am joining parents up and down the country in such joyful activities as stationery-buying (fun!), uniform-trying-on (much less fun), and…dun dun dunnnn…the buying of school shoes.

Beta Mummy Cooks…Lasagne


Beta Mummy COOKS logo

I’m no Alpha Mummy – I’m not a great cook, I don’t have a pristine, marble-topped kitchen, and I don’t have the time to lovingly prepare nutritionally-balanced food for my family at every single meal.  But I do try…so I decided that I would share some of the things I’ve learned along the way, by featuring some extremely special Beta Mummy recipes on my website.

I started off nice and easy last time with cheese on toast, but today I’ve bravely gone for something a little more complicated.  I would not recommend attempting this on a work night – save it for the weekend when you’ve got a bit more time on your hands.  Stick the kids in front of CBeebies and let’s get started with Beta Mummy’s Lasagne recipe:

Off to the Beach with Alpha Mummy & Beta Mummy


My Feral Children and I are very lucky to live on the beautiful South coast of England, within a couple of miles of the most gorgeous sandy beach.

Picture of Feral Child Number Two playing on the beach.

I try to take them to the beach as often as I can, all year round.  This is not because I am a wonderful back-to-nature type parent.  It’s more because the kids love it there so will happily get in the car (outbound trip only), they can run around like complete loons without trashing my house/garden, and a morning of digging sometimes wears them out enough for me to hit the parenting jackpot of a Dual-Child Nap.

What Happened To My Face?!


I spend very little time looking in the mirror. In fact, some days I realise in my work lunch break that I haven’t actually checked at any point that I don’t have breakfast in my teeth, toothpaste on my nose, or snot in my hair. But the other morning I happened to take a good long look in the mirror.  MY GOD. MY FACE!  What happened to my face?!

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